Recovering Pounds from Ghosts

GoSS recovers 6 million Pounds paid to ghost employees as they introduce the new electronic payroll system. Now, all government employees will be expected to open a bank account, which will be used for the payment of their wages rather than to simply hand them the cash. The Citizen printed newspaper, reported that whilst going through the various 'ghost employees', they found a 13 year old boy being paid a Captain's wages.

A letter to GoSS

Dear Government of South Sudan,

Allow me to start off by saying that I am a big fan. Working alongside your many, many.....many commissions,ministries and bureaus for peace and security has brought great pleasure to my life. However, I am writing to you today to discuss a more serious matter. I would like to make a request for you to cease all lighting upgrades and modifications to your many, many....many Landcruisers. Firstly, as pimping as having neon lights on the skirting of your cars might be, it may come across as unprofessional and decadent to your citizens. More importantly though, please resist from adding those blindingly bright white-light head lights to your cars. Just because it helps you see other people and cars better, does not mean that they can see you. I would suggest following Malakal's example and putting in some street lights. Finally, I realise that most of your employees are always in a hurry, as the referendum is approaching so closely and theres still so much to be done. I also realise that when flashing the car in front of you with your flood lights, as annoying as it is, is a universal signal for "get out of the way". However, attaching strobe lights to your head lights is just F***ING RIDICULOUS!! Therefore, I implore you, to remove said strobe lights from all government vehicles and prevent the disastrous and dramatic increase in government induced road accidents.

Thank you and good luck with the coming referendum.